[committee] Bin Maintainence

[Sam Moore]

Dear UCC,

By now you have heard this rant many times before. Many others have given 
this rant and given up in disgust. Now it seems as soon to be Ex-Vice President 
it is my turn. So here goes:

The natural state of a bin is empty. Bins want to not have stuff in them.

This may be hard to believe as the Cameron Hall bins are so rarely seen in 
this state, but I assure you it is true. The bins cry themselves to sleep every 
night. They are in a state of living hell. Or they would be if they 
weren't inanimate objects. So spare a thought for the poor bins.

Should you see a bin approaching a full state, the correct procedure is to
empty the bin into a larger bin. This larger bin will in turn be emptied 
(by someone else) into a larger bin and so on and so forth until the 
contents end up in the pacific ocean or a national park.

The point is, we want the rubbish to leave the clubroom, not accumulate in 
it.

Should the bin be full, the following locations are *not* suitable 
alternatives:
  1. On the floor
  2. Behind computers
  3. On the coffee table
  4. Under the couches
  5. The floor of the loft
  6. On chairs

A particular emphasis should be placed on food stuff.
Particularly carrot.
Particularly pieces of gravy saturated carrot in a lidless container.
Particularly those pieces of carrot placed on chairs.
Particularly the pieces that I sat on earlier today.

The "larger bin" for UCC is downstairs. It is the giant bin in the 
carpark.

A crucial component to the bin system is a "bin bag". This prevents the 
contents of the bin from attaching to the sides and gaining sentience.

Bin bags can be found in the cleaning box behind the door.

Should the supply of bin bags be depleted, bin bags should be purchased as 
soon as possible from Nedlands Hardware Store at Broadway shopping centre.

This is an ideal location as it is the same place that many of you will go 
on a daily basis in order to purchase consumables for dropping in the bin.

The optimum size is 90L bags. The price is around $8 for 20 bags and you 
will be reimbursed and applauded for your initiative. Remember to place 
the receipt in the safe. If you are a coke member, no one will care if you 
reimburse yourself.

Once you have purchased bin bags, be sure to place packaging in the 
bin, inside one of the bin bags.

Finally, although recycling is a commendable initiative, it seems that a 
reminder is in order: Recycling is not a spontaneous process. For 
recycling to work, someone has to put the recyclables in a recycling bin.

For reference, I provide a photo illustrating an example of a bin in the 
full state:

http://matches.ucc.asn.au/sadbin.jpg

Kind Regards and Best of Luck in your Bin Maintainence Careers,
Sam Moore
[SZM]
UCC Vice President 2013

* I get it, emptying the bin is a pain. It gets more painful the fuller it 
is.